Fandom: Yu-Gi-Oh! GX
Relationships: Manjoume Jun/Yuuki Juudai, Kanou Martin/Saotome Rei, Marufuji Ryou/Tenjouin Fubuki, Saiou Mizuchi/Tenjouin Asuka
Characters: Manjoume Jun, Yuuki Juudai, Tenjouin Asuka, Marufuji Shou, Manjoume Chosaku, Manjoume Shouji, Saotome Rei, Kanou Martin, Tenjouin Fubuki, Marufuji Ryou, Saiou Mizuchi, Misawa Daichi
Rating: T
Type: Chapter fic
Chapters: 32
Words: 43,668
Warnings: Graphic depictions of violence, suicidal thoughts, implied/referenced homophobia, mental illness
Tags: attempted murder, angst, time skips, panic attacks, vomiting
Originally posted: 2020-02-23
Completed: 2021-02-02
The first night at Misawa's.
The first night in Tokyo was disastrous. It wasn’t anyone’s fault but his own, Jun knew, as he had been too chicken to ask Juudai to stay when he went to crash on Asuka’s couch after they asked if he wanted Juudai to stay and he’d said no. Like a coward.
He regretted it now, at 3 in the morning after only an hour of sleep at most, and he felt too awkward to walk around the apartment on his own at this time of night, even though Misawa had told him he could snoop around or get up at any time he wanted. So now he was sitting in the window in Asuka’s old room, his one comfort being his cat who was sleeping in his arms and draped over his chest, chin on his shoulder and nose against his neck. His arms had gotten tired a long time ago, but he didn’t want to move.
Jun looked out at the night sky. Hardly any stars could be seen with all the lights of the gigantic city. He wasn’t used to a view like this anymore. Back when he’d been young he’d spent a lot of time in Tokyo, especially in middle school when he’d still tried to spend time with his brothers at the main office. The thought of how close the corporation’s main office now was was a big part of why he’d been unable to sleep, having been woken up by nightmares that he hadn’t had in quite some time. He was disoriented this late at night and after so long of being away that he wasn’t sure which direction it was from here, but just being within the same city was terrifying, especially when he wasn’t sure if the window faced that particular direction.
He was startled out of his rising anxiety by a hand on his shoulder, his jump being enough to jostle Cheeseburger awake. The yelp that escaped him was anything but discreet or dignified.
Misawa took a step back, an apologetic smile on his face. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you. I’ve been talking to you but you didn’t react.” Misawa was decked out in flannel pajamas and managed to hold two mugs in one hand somehow. Jun accepted one when it was offered, and Cheeseburger rearranged herself to curl around his shoulders. Misawa sat down on the edge of the desk that was pushed against the window. “I was going to the bathroom and saw you sitting there. I guess your cat pushed the door more open earlier.” It had been left cracked open for her earlier, and Jun knew Misawa was probably right. She had been rubbing her cheeks against everything to scent it all evening and had no doubt done so with the door as well.
“I uh. Didn’t notice you.”
“I figured. Couldn’t sleep, huh? A lot’s happened today so that makes sense.” Jun nodded slowly, and sipped the tea in the mug he’d been given. It was a bit sweet for his taste, but he didn’t want to say anything. Not right now when he finally had something to take his mind off things.
“I haven’t been this close to my brothers in almost a decade. It must’ve affected me more than I thought.”
Being so open with Misawa felt weird, given that they’d never been close in high school, but he’d already decided to show vulnerability with Juudai and Asuka. If he was going to stay with Misawa now, he felt like he owed him at least that much as well. He wanted to try to be better, this time around. He’d never been the nicest friend to anyone before, and these days he regretted it.
“Their main office is in Marunouchi, right?” Jun gave another nod, “I don’t remember what direction it is from here, and I… it stressed me out.”
“It’s in the direction the kitchen is facing. Opposite of this window. I don’t know if that helps at all.”
“Maybe.” He wouldn’t know until the next time he managed to fall asleep, and while the tea helped, he had a feeling it would take him a while to wind down enough to do so.
“How long were you and Asuka-kun roommates for? Neither of you ever showed any signs of living together on social media.” Asuka’s social media was very professional and Misawa tended to post nothing but science, math and card things. Especially math things.
“About three years. She moved in with me after my last relationship fell through because I needed someone there and she pitched in. Then she just ended up staying until she moved in with Mizuchi.”
“Oh. Okay.” The conversation stalled after that, neither of them really knowing how to talk to the other. It struck Jun that he might not have had even one regular conversation with Misawa. The silence was awkward, but not that bad. Jun didn’t even notice when he drifted off to sleep.
When Jun woke up he had expected to be in terrible pain from having fallen asleep in the window, but to his surprise he was curled up in the bed when he opened his eyes. He could hear the sound of one person talking and an absence of fur in his nose, and realised Misawa must have carried him to bed after he’d fallen asleep. He’d slept heavily the rest of the night, too tired to dream, and he was thankful for that, and for Misawa having moved him, even though the thought was terribly embarrassing. Did he really weigh so little that it took the other man so little effort that Jun didn’t even stir when it happened? The man wasn’t even that in shape, he was a math geek, not a jock. He had enough online presence to show that he’d rather read math textbooks than go to the gym.
Jun pinched at his stomach, and yeah, he really had lost a lot of weight since high school. He felt like Juudai’s cooking had made him gain a tiny bit of it back the last few days though.
Cheeseburger yowled at him from the floor to get out of bed, and as if on cue, his stomach growled. He followed his cat into the kitchen where Misawa had his nose buried in his laptop, typing away. A loaf of bread was out, and an entire pot of coffee was brewing on the countertop.
Jun looked between the coffee, bread and Misawa, unsure of what to do. Last night, Misawa had yet again reminded him that he was free to do whatever he wanted in the apartment, but he still felt out of sorts in the situation. A slight amount of regret passed through him at the thought of having lost his old apartment forever, but it disappeared as soon as Cheeseburger nudged his leg with her head and meowed, bringing Misawa out of his own thoughts.
“Oh, hey, good morning. I gave her breakfast since Juudai warned me about her yelling.” He got up as the coffee finished brewing, pouring himself a cup and opening a cabinet, pointing to it. “I’ve got milk and sugar and stuff right next to the brewer, mugs and cups are in there. Just get yourself anything out of the fridge that you want except for the boxes labelled with the days on it. That’s my lunch boxes. I’ve got the morning off today but I’m heading to the office later, so you can spend some time getting used to this place on your own if you want. Or invite someone over, that’s okay too. But if you invite Fubuki, don’t let him near the fridge without supervision.”
The little monologue made Jun’s head spin for a moment before his mind caught up, but in the end he nodded, as Misawa sat back down with his coffee after adding ridiculous amounts of milk and sugar (that explained the tea).
He started to prepare two sandwiches for himself, then looked at the mug. His eye caught on one that had a bunch of generation 1 pokemon on it, and filled it with nothing but coffee before sitting down opposite of Misawa. Cheeseburger jumped up on his lap right away and started to purr. He could see Misawa smile at him from behind his coffee cup.